dinsdag 24 mei 2011

Interlude

Monastery Life
A young monk arrives at the monastery. He is assigned to helping the other monks in copying the old canons and laws by hand.
He notices, however, that all of the monks are copying from copies, not from the original manuscript. So, the new monk goes to the head abbot to question this, pointing out that if someone made even a small error in the first copy, it would never be picked up! In fact, that error would be continued in all of the subsequent copies.
The head monk, says, "We have been copying from the copies for centuries, but you make a good point, my son."
He goes down into the dark caves underneath the monastery where the original manuscripts are held as archives in a locked vault that hasn't been opened for hundreds of years. Hours go by and nobody sees the old abbot.

So, the young monk gets worried and goes down to look for him. He sees him banging his head against the wall and wailing, "We missed the "R" ! , we missed the "R" !"
His forehead is all bloody and bruised and he is crying uncontrollably.
The young monk asks the old abbot, "What's wrong, father?"
With A choking voice, the old abbot replies, "The word was... CELEBRATE !!! "

The Pope, Sai Baba and the Dalai Lama
It was a beautiful day along the coast, quiet, sunny and warm. The Pope, Sai Baba and the Dalai Lama had decided to take a day off from their various opinions and duties, rented a boat, and went fishing.
A couple hours pass, at the expense of several ocean-creatures. Then Sai Baba spots a McDonalds at the beach. "Hey, I'm dead hungry. I'm off for a Big Mac". He jumps from the boat and quickly steps across the water. The Dalai Lama goes: "Great, I'm in." Jumps from the boat, runs across the water to land, where Sai Baba is already ordering.
The Pope stands a little behind, having never walked on water. But if those two non-Christians can do that, it should be no problem for him. He jumps the boat, goes "plop", and disappears.
Sai Baba and the Dalai Lama, enjoying their freshly materialized burgers, watch the scene.
Dalai Lama: "That didn't look good."
Sai Baba: "No, we really should have told him about those underwater stepping stones."
Dalai Lama: "Stepping stones??"


Flapping flag
Four monks were meditating in a monastery. All of a sudden the prayer flag on the roof started flapping.
The younger monk came out of his meditation and said: "Flag is flapping"
A more experienced monk said: "Wind is flapping"
A third monk who had been there for more than 20 years said: "Mind is flapping."
The fourth monk who was the eldest said: "Mouths are flapping!"

The other side

A student is on one side of a raging river. There are no bridges. He has no boat. He shouts out to the master on the opposite bank. “How do I get to the other side?” The master shouts back: “You are on the other side.”

The afterlife

A Catholic, a Muslim, and a Buddhist are discussing their beliefs about the afterlife:

The Catholic: "I will spend eternity in heaven worshipping the Lord."

The Muslim: "I will spend eternity in Paradise with 10,000 virgins."

The Buddhist (after meditating on the question):
"I will be reborn as a Muslim."

(thnx to rudyh.org and some other sites)

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